Document rates Tory hopefuls
Sep. 28, 2006.

British Columbia MP Stockwell Day is the Conservative MP Liberals would least like to face in a general election.

Although the Conservatives are not currently in a leadership race, Liberal strategists are fearful that a quick switch of leadership could lead to a CPC majority government. The conclusions are contained in a super top secret exclusive confidential memo obtained by Calgary Grit, and written by prominent Liberal strategist David Herle.

Herle, a key Liberal war-room strategist in the last federal election, says Day “worries me most.” “People look at Stockwell Day and they see a young, vibrant leader who looks great in a wetsuit.” the report continues. “Stopping the Day momentum in a campaign would be akin to reversing the flow of Niagara Falls.”

In contrast, Harper is seen as a “Liberal wet dream” due to his cold personality and considerable baggage. The report concludes that his record as Prime Minister would become an issue in an election campaign.

While some have questioned the timing and conclusions of this leaked top secret report, most agree this is the work of the infamous “Liberal mole”.