Vote out Anders

I had the dubious chance to attend a Conservative function where Rob Anders was one of the speakers a few days ago. I have some Conservative friends and I figured it’d be good for a few laughs if nothing else. And Rob did not disappoint.

Maybe it was the fact that it was a Conservative event with no media or maybe he’s just naturally insane. Either way, Rob had recently read a book on the decline of the Roman empire and couldn’t help drawing parallels between the fall of Rome and modern Canadian society. The reasons Rome fell and the reasons Canada is in crisis today according to Mr. Anders?

Well, Rob started talking about all the splinter languages which formed in Rome and compromised the universal Latin. “He’s not going to go there” I said to myself as he started this rant but, surely enough, he did. “Bilingualism is a problem today” Rob said. He complained that plaques that had been unilingual are now English and French and that it “didn’t help” that people spoke “Chinese and Arab and other languages too” in Canada.

Completely shocked, he went on to explain why the clothes people wear today are a major problem. Since fewer and fewer people wear “respectable” clothes, there are some major problems on the horizon. This was followed with the predictable complaint about the lack of military spending. Then we got to Rob’s favourite topic – “moral decay”. “The problem with homosexuality and gay marriage” was that it led to a declining birth rate. He failed to elaborate on how the Romans forced gay people to breed but explained that they had tax breaks such that you didn’t pay taxes if you had 5 children. Fair enough, but even with tax breaks, you aren’t going to see a lot of gay people having five children since I’m pretty sure I can guess where Rob stands on gay adoption.

Finally, he touched on religion. Religion is on the decline in Canada and this has caused people to lose their moral compass according to Rob. Without religion (and by religion, I’m positive he meant “Christian religion”, although he didn’t say so), there’s no way for people to know what’s right or wrong. “You have to feel murder and thievery are wrong” if there’s no church to tell you according to Rob. Personally, even though I’m a Liberal, I kind of feel thievery is wrong irrespective of what my Church tells me.

After listening to Rob speak for an evening, I truly hope the Liberals follow around the 10 or 12 most Anders-like Conservative MPs and wait for them to say stuff like this. It’s a strategy that can’t fail.